Buzzing

Life has been generous with me.

Last Tuesday evening, post-work I had the joy of meeting up with my good friend, M, at our favourite place. We gossiped and shared our lives over a White Sangria, Burger, Truffle fries and Fried Chicken Tenders in a Basket. A bundle of joy and with the biggest heart ever, M made the start of my week easy.

Wednesday, I met up with ex-classmates from Secondary School for drinks in a bar none of us had been to. Located at the basement of a ramen bar, we got a quick dinner before heading downstairs. For dinner, I had a $5(!) bowl of Char Siu Rice paired with Yuzu Sake Soda. Some would say the rice bowl was small but it was the perfect for me. I usually have very little stomach for big dinners since I tend to fill it up during the day.

When dinner was done, we headed downstairs for some amazing drinks like Whiskey Sour, Berried in Bison Grass (with Polish Vodka as the base), The Madame, and Planters Punch.

It also helped that the Head Bartender was hilarious and always an effective photobomber!

On Friday, I had the sudden urge to run. I ran a lot last year. Averaging 10km a day at least 3 times a week. I was slim, I ate clean, and I felt so good everyday. Then work started this year and my running regime faltered. I lacked the energy to run for more than 6km at a time or more than half hour on the treadmill; which I found intensely boring. On Friday, I ran and hit 8km. It was a tough run with me stopping to take a walk three times. But at the end of the 8km, I felt so alive. I felt I could see everything so clearly. I felt satisfied. So here is me in pink pants, post-run high and with voluminous hair off to meet up w my friends.

Dinner on Friday night was a quick catch-up with ex-law school classmates and my girlfriend introduced us her new boyfriend. It was lovely. Connecting with my girlfriends again was the highlight of the evening. I had a Double-layered Chocolate Cake for dinner. And we ordered the three types of Sangrias available in the cafe: a white, Reisling-based, and two Red wine-based, Strawberry, and Rose and Berries – fun combinations.

Unfortunately my Friday evening was a bit of a letdown and until today I still have not talked to my girlfriend. We went to a new club and it was as exciting as I thought. Then at 3am, in another club, drama erupted over a boy, which in my opinion has done nothing wrong. I am so over boy drama. Such dramas are, in my opinion, a complete waste of time. I rather be single and boy-less then to go through such drama. I rather save all that energy for work, to progress my career, and achieve a meaningful productive life. So that night, in my state of exhaustion from dancing for four hours, I effectively told her to snap out of it. I was also deeply bored by the clubbing scene. Unfortunately I have gotten it out of my system.

Saturday was a better day. In the afternoon I watched my tuition teacher, from Secondary School, get married. It was heartwarming for my whole family as she taught my sisters and I for about 10 years? She first taught my eldest sister, then second, then me! So she was an important figure in our lives. The wedding ceremony was beautiful and the page boy was a little shy to walk down the aisle and kept walking away so his dad had to walk him down.

In the evening, I tried out two places: Symmetry and Bar Stories. The Spatchcock at Symmetry was good! It was a tastier version of a chicken and the skin, which was glazed with a sweet sauce was delicious. I did not order other food so as to save calories as my goal that night was to drink. We ordered a Yakult Grape Sake to share and my friend ordered an Iced Tea cocktail. Both were good. I grew red quickly from the Yakult Sake and it was surprisingly alcoholic as it was subtle in taste. The alcoholic taste was overpowered by the Grape Yakult which made me so pleased.

After dinner, we hopped to another bar on a small street. Sitting by the bar counter, we had the luxury of securing full attention from the Bartenders. It was a fun experience. We picked out ingredients and even a pan lurking behind the counter and the bartenders created cocktails around it. The winner that night was my friend’s Peanut Butter Dessert Cocktail and my Yuzu Hokkaido Grape.

Peanut Butter Dessert Cocktail on the left and my Tiramisu on the right.

Apple Pie Cocktail. We wanted a drink that incorporated that little pan hence the caramelized apples.

I was told the drinks in the bar was not good but I had good drinks, no doubt from the full attention from the bartenders.

The Past Weekend

It was a perfect weekend.

On Saturday, I went back to my Alma Mater for a 10 year Reunion. My class turnout was pathetic (only 5 out of 30) but it was still great fun seeing them. It also turns out my ex-classmate’s boyfriend is the chef and owner of an Italian restaurant I hold dearly in my heart.

So… It was not surprising, on the very same day, I dragged my family to try the said Italian restaurant. I was overjoyed to see my family enjoying the food. Even the Pappardella Mushroom Cream Sauce was a winner for them. My family usually prefers light, Japanese/ Korean, dinners, so them liking the rich Italian food was a huge surprise.

Notable food included (from top left, clockwise) the Pappardella Mushroom Cream Sauce, Mixed Grilled Platter for 2, Burrata with Spinach and delicious sweet tomatoes, and the Veal Tripe Stew. Including two desserts, two other pastas (Squid Ink w Seafood and Vongole), the bill for my family of 6 amounted to $276.40. A tad pricey but such good hearty food!

On Sunday, a quiet afternoon was interrupted by a “thud!”. The monkeys had jumped onto my Dad’s car, made their own into our kitchen, and helped themselves to a sweet potato.

Then it was off to the relatively new Pasarbella at Turf City! The Fig and Date Waffles ($8) from Charly T’s was a surprise and clear winner for me that afternoon. Crunchy and buttery. Ask nicely for extra chocolate sauce, and maple sauce will be included too. The Spicy Pork Hotdog  ($7.80) from Hub’s Deli/ Butchery was good which was definitely helped by the price point. Other food were quite costly. $22 for a small rack of Pork Ribs from Charly T’s was, in my opinion, a tad overpriced. The Paella looked amazing but taste meh!

Sunday dinner, my dear friend Jenn hosted us in her parent’s place. Her garden was filled with loads of beautiful foliage; her parents are definitely very capable in the garden. I was spoilt during dinner. Good friends who know how to cook well AND choose their wine. I could not resist a glass of red and white.

Jenn made her delicious Broccoli Quiche. She added cheddar cheese into the pastry for extra oomph! Greg made a generous Sausage Bean Casserole. In my opinion, no pork dish can ever go wrong. Niyati prepared a Vegetarian Noodle Salad; fresh green, red and yellow peppers, chery tomatoes, tofu, cucumber, and crunchy peanuts. I bought a half dozen box of Twelve Cupcakes (not pictured).

All in all, another perfect weekend.

I want to be my own Anti-stress Hero!

Woke up in the moring, weighed myself, and a wave of stress and self-doubt descended upon me when I saw the numbers. I have gained 3kg since work started. I could blame a million and one things but it all boils down to me. All those sweet treats, deprivation then binging; thinking I could get away with it all. Before 9am, I already wanted this day to quickly go by so that I could hit the gym in the evening, and sleep away the fat. Can you believe it?

Then I came across this post on escaping stress by being one’s own Anti-stress Hero. How? Writer Alan Cohen states:

“Think of a person or people who inspire you as being relaxed, happy, and successful. You don’t have to be like them, just try to tap onto their ability to deal.”

But I think what was more powerful was this:

“That was the moment when Alan realized that stress is not a condition, it is a choice.”

This morning, I allowed myself to “fall” from those numbers on the weighing scale. That figure is important but I have the rest of the day to “seize” the opportunity to get healthy again! To get rid of that bloatedness, fat, hopelessness, and all the other negative energy that constantly washes over me making me detest living. Today I am going to choose to live stress-free and take care of myself!

Plus: 50 ways to cope with stress.

Weekend Obsession

Yesterday morning I came across this picture and the array of vintage cocktail glasses, in the top right picture, left me swooning. I spent whatever free time I had on Etsy looking for similar glasses. <3

Letting go …. of food

This post marks the first step towards letting go of food. The past few months I noticed I had gone from enjoying to depending on food; I have been using food to fill a void in my life. My days have been filled with looking forward to food at each meal instead of the more important, companions, conversations, and other social joys of a meal.

I worry about what I should eat so as not to gain weight. If the meal was planned beforehand, I would look up the menu, sometimes days before, and note what to order. Sometimes I will cancel appointments just because the menu doesn’t have any “low fat” food. When I wake up, food is all I can think about. What’s for breakfast? When I have finished that breakfast, what’s the snack after? What’s for lunch? My day is dictated by breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

If the food does not taste good, my mood will tumble; I will get sad and frustrated. My mind will be filled with regret for not eating good food. And even more sadly, when food is presented in front of me, I attack it with a vengence. I ignore my companions and just focus on eating as much as my tummy can hold. I eat senselessly; not noticing the flavours or the ongoing conversations. I have this fear that the food will disappear and leave me, and it makes me want to fill my plate with as much as the plate can hold. When the plate is empty, and usually very quickly so, I will grab and pile more food on to the plate. I grip on to cutleries for dear life and sit ever so closely and tightly to the table. Meals usually end in a blur. I don’t remember what my friends said, or anything they say are, in my opinion, trivial, but only because I wasn’t concentrating. When I see people eat, I want to eat too. I don’t want to “miss out”. I want to be able to eat it and say to myself, “done! Out of my system!”.

All my conversation revolves around food. It is all I can think and talk about. I don’t know what else to say except for food. When I see people eating, the food is all I can look. I do not notice the person or its surroundings. And slowly but surely, I have gotten selfish over food. I watch over it like a hawk, watching people finish the food before me makes me sad; as if my life is empty without me finishing it.

This has been due to many changes in my life this year. I have gotten tired of exercising. I used to troll through exercise videos on Youtube but now that’s not as exciting. Exercising has now simply become a habit, I no longer find joy and have forgotten about the importance and benefits of doing so. I have stopped clubbing; so time spent thinking of which club to visit on Wednesdays or Saturdays are now freed up. Naturally, thinking about food fills the available time.

Needless to say, I have a serious eating disorder. It dawned on me one day that the weekend, which couldn’t be more perfect as it was filled with my family and friends, passed in a blur. I can not remember what I chatted about with them except remember the food we ate. I feel like a pig. I want to connect back to life. I want to breathe life. I want to connect back to human beings.

Today chronicles my journey to let go of food. The baby steps I will take. The times when I didn’t clean my plate and felt bad about it. I have only myself to account for and today it begins.

Grateful

Tonight, my bus arrived shortly after I reached the bus-stop. Tired and with my leg hurting, the sight of the bus filled my heart with such joy.

Second situation I’m grateful for: My Senior sitting down and teaching me what a good note taking entails.

The Past Weekend

The past weekend was amazing! Filled with family, friends and no work, I couldn’t asked for a better weekend. On Saturday I had a monthly cookout with good friends who know their way around the kitchen very well. There was good food and fashion tips tossed around during the afternoon. At the end of lunch, I was stuffed and felt more fashion savvy. Unfocused, unfiltered pictures ahead. I deleted the filtered-to-death ones for they were taking up too much space on my phone… Oops!

There was Zee, Zhu, Diana, Andrew, my bro-in-law KW, sis, and Marc.

I made a Roasted Cauliflower & Chickpeas Salad by adapting the recipe from here. I omitted the raisins and cilantro, added crushed toasted almonds, used a creamy Tahini dressing instead (three tablespoons Tahini, one lemon, tons of Paprika, Cayenne Pepper and Chill Powder), and topped it all with Italian Parsley. The subtle sweetness from the caramelized cauliflower and lightness made for a perfect hot afternoon. Was pretty impressed with myself for making a savoury dish. I spend wayy too much time baking.

Food from the monthly cookout. My sis made a crabmeat roll, unagi and tofu, Marcus made a Braised Pork Vermicelli (I loved the green bean which gave the noodles a delicious crunch!), Andrew made his Uncle’s chicken curry (not pictured) which had three secret ingredients, and Norwegian Chocolate. I was a little hesistant about the chocolate that my bro-in-law brought back but I definitely bit my tongue. It was so addictive! Milk chocolate filled with pecans, cashews, and a very cute packaging to boot! Highlight of the afternoon was watching Andrew give up the three secret ingredients for fashion tips. Hilarious!

Sunday evening, post gym workout, called for more workout in Paragon Supermarket. Spotted Japanese Fruit Wines and I was salivating! The bottom left, and how I desire to drink it so much, reads: Kumamoto Kyoho Dessert Wine (Made from 100% Kyoho king of Japanese grape. Complex and attractive aroma similar to brown cane sugar and caramel. Very sweet but elegant). Funny how there is a “but” after very sweet. As if sweet and elegance can’t go hand-in-hand. Anyway, gonna keep a lookout for this wine in DFS in July.